La Norriture Douche - Official Trailer

As many of you may now know, the Food Douche, despite my greatest efforts, was unable to avoid mainstream fame.

The Hollywood buzz surrounding "La Norriture Douche" has proven overwhelming to all, and the production trailer of the much anticipated film has been leaked.

'The Food Douche' Teaser Trailer from Sweven Films on Vimeo.

Sweven Films has publicly stated that this is infact their masterpiece.
Be sure to check out their other productions at www.swevenfilms.com


Enjoy!

Al Capone's SUCKS

From FDA

As some of you may remember, I awarded the best meatball sub in the city to Al Capone's on Broad st. Downtown.

I am taking it back!

I just walked through multiple blocks worth of slush and snowbanks to warm my soul with the once dominant spheres of meat, only to experience the worst, most stale piece of bread I can ever admit to consuming.

Not only has this travesty of a sandwich caused me to resurrect the Douche, but I VOW to set right my wrongs of the past, and NEVER lead you astray from this day forth.


Al, F*ck you, you suck!


Your Meatball champion status has been REVOKED!!!

Clarke WHO?

Every once in a while there comes a time to admit you were wrong. The Food Douche is admitting he was wrong. The first bite of Jacob Wirth's Blue Cheese Burger changed the burger game in Boston. J-Wirth has raised the bar.

From Drop Box

From the mountain of creamy crumbled blue cheese, to the heavenly juicy burger grilled to perfection, AND the always perfect French fries... This burger experience was one for the books.

From Drop Box

Not only does His Majesty Mr. Wirth take the crown for the best Blue Cheese Burger in Beantown, but he straight up SHAMED Clarke into removing his submission entirely.

From Drop Box

I'm not sure if I can ever eat a burger at Clarke's again!
Or at least not with a straight face.

Wicked Gangsta' Meatballs!

After searching the city high and low, turning over rocks and braving the snow, the call for a worthy meatball sub has been answered.

From FDA

Al Capone’s at 82 Summer Street in Boston has the most delicious meatballs in all the land.

Typically Capone’s is a middle-of-the-road choice when you’re looking for something huge and really fattening, but today they have proven themselves “kings of the balls of meat.” The Meatball itself is what set this sammy apart. The perfect blend of meats and spices was exactly what the Douche was looking for.

From FDA

For those who aren’t familiar, Al Capone’s offers two sizes of sandwiches: freaking huge, and too freaking huge. The “Small” as they like to call it, is about a foot long. The “Large” is a monstrous 20” sub. I have ordered the large here before, and they literally wrap the two halves separately. Here is a graphical representation of what it feels like to eat this thing.

From FDA

I was very surprised at how long it took to find a seriously tasty meatball. One place that came through as a close second was Hot Tomatoes at 92 Bedford.

From FDA

Their bread is second to none, baked fresh every day and was by far the star of the show. They use excellent quality ingredients in everything that they do, so of course I was shocked to find a flavorless set of meatballs in their sandwich, or “The Don” as they call it. They say that they use “Carmen” homemade Apuglian meatballs, where “Apuglian” in this case translates directly to “sucks”.

Now everyone gather together and sigh your relief, the Douche has done it again. Save yourself the disappointment and go eat Capone’s meatballs. Now rated as the best meatball sub Boston has to offer.

If you or someone you know would like to challenge the mighty Capone as the #1 meatball sub in the city, post the time and place and the Food Douche will be there.

Mediocre Meatballs

This is a cry for help.

For weeks I have been asking every person I see eating a Meatball sub what they think of it, and every time the answer is undoubtedly "Meh".

From FDA

So of course, I take to the streets and try and find the best Meatball sub in the city.

If you or someone you know, has the 411 on the best Meatballs in town, PLEASE let me know.

Post up here if you know a good one and I'll try it.

- FD

The Perfect Pesto

Dare I say that Al’s South Street Café’s Chicken pesto sub as been dethroned?

From FDA

One brisk fall afternoon, Figaro’s on 105 Beach Street in Boston MA (www.figarosboston.com) changed the way I think about Chicken pesto sandwiches forever.

From FDA

The Fellini on Ciabatta- grilled chicken, provolone cheese, BACON, sliced tomato and pesto mayo served on a grilled ciabatta roll. My mouth is watering right now just remembering it. Some say that there is no savory meal that cannot be enhanced by the addition of bacon, and in no instance has this ever rang more true. One could also say, that no savory sandwich cannot be enhanced by the addition of Figaro’s fresh grilled ciabatta!

Now stop me if I go too far by saying that, grilled chicken pesto, bacon, cheese, and a crusty fresh ciabatta are damn near the perfect combination of ingredients. I could live the rest of my life, and still be comparing other sandwiches to this.

Beyond a passing recommendation or stern urging, I am straight up DEMANDING that you drop what you’re doing, get out of your chair and run your ass down to Figaro’s for this sandwich.

Dope, fly, pimp, hustla, gangsta freakin’ sandwich!

- FD

The Rumanian Titan

If there were words that could describe The Rumanian Pastrami sandwich at Sam LaGrassa’s on Province St., you can bet they would sound something like, “Holy freaking crap”. I have been ordering this sandwich in exactly the same way for two and a half years and I have never EVER thought twice about it. I get the Rumanian Pastrami on a round roll, with onions mustard and American cheese, quite possibly the finest combination of things.

From FDA

Now I’ve had more than my fair share of pastrami, but never have I had one with quite the same impact as this. When I bite into this sandwich the world goes quite around me. My vision Blurs, my mind goes blank and I drift into realization that everything is going to be ok.

From FDA

Crowned as the number one sandwich on the planet, Mr. Lagrassa has truly created something great.
I dare you to find one better.

- FD

Boston's Best Blue Cheese Burger

From FDA

Without any doubt, I can say that Clarke's at South Station (www.clarkessouthstation.com) has the best damn Blue Cheese Burger EVER.

From FDA

There are many criteria a douche will use when choosing a burger, most important of course, is a burgers "Dopeness". Clarke's Blue Cheese Burger challenges the very meaning of the word "Dope". It makes me wonder if anything before this was ever really dope at all! When you toss in an order of their signature Dublin fries, and a bottle of Gulden’s Spicy Brown on the table, we’re ready to rock. Just hold the bottle upside down over your exposed burger and squeeze. The result? The best Blue Cheese Burger in the City.

This Food Douche lunch food choice of the week gets to sit at NUMBER 1 out of the top ten best lunch foods ever…. At least for now.

Welcome! I am The Food Douche.

Welcome to Boston's first Food Douche blog!
Here you will find all of the best of everything food.

Stay tuned for weekly reviews of Boston's finest lunch foods by the biggest Food Douche in the city.

Me!

From The Food Douche

Sincerely,
- Alex "The Food Douche" Straffin